Revealing Your True Motives

This is the last post of a 3 part series on why we are made to wait for something worth having. You might prefer to start with reading reading the introduction here.

Note: I have created these series using a Colombian couple’s story of the suffering and difficulties that Colombians endured for 30 years and still live today. Through their personal views, experiences and lessons learned, I discovered 3 great reasons why waiting is a part of our journey to achieving any goal… right through to finding your life’s purpose!

A very special thank you to Lina and Jaime for sharing their story

Here’s the 3rd reason:

To Discover and Reveal Our True Motives

When we want something badly and are made to wait before getting it, our true colors are revealed. Sometimes, we forget about all the things we already have. They no longer have any importance and no longer satisfy our happiness. We look at others who are making more money, getting the better jobs or achieving their life dreams and get angry. We think, “what about me? I deserve it too. Why isn’t it happening for me? I’m a good person. I need it more than they do, I have 3 kids to take care of.”

I really don’t mean to sound insensitive in what I’m about to say. I too was made to wait to learn this – I’m still learning.

Here it is.

Colombians will always have great intentions in wanting to accomplish something; getting a better job, get a degree…But, as soon as they face having to confront struggles, their true motives for wanting it begin to surface. You see, many Colombians want to own the end result as quickly as possible. They want to get there without owning the efforts, commitment and actions that are necessary to achieve their goal. Many of them either give up or try to find some other way of achieving their true ‘hidden’ goal’…fast money, power and status. Most of what they want to accomplish is really to have something through which they could identify themselves with.

The ones who truly wanted to accomplish their goal, waited and pursued it. They too wanted it badly, the difference is they had a passion for the actual goal. They wanted it bad enough to wait, to face the struggles and learn what they needed to learn.

From my own experience, I too was faced with questioning my true motives for pursuing becoming an engineer. I went through many rejections, failing exams, having to work to help my family, getting fired from multiple jobs, being told that I wouldn’t get paid for a job because there was no money… just to name a few. Yes, I got very frustrated and angry. I thought about giving up or cheat my way like everyone else. One day, I went for a walk, as I passed by the church, the church bells began to ring. I looked through the open doors and almost felt a push to go inside. I sat on a bench facing the altar and asked, “why God? do you want me to quit? I don’t want to quit. I know I can serve you and this country if I achieve this. If this is not how you want me to serve you, I’ll quit. Let me know.”

In that moment, I felt a tremendous peace. A huge weight had been lifted. I no longer felt I needed to have all the answers. I sat there in silence for almost an hour. No more questions, no more thoughts and no more trying to figure things out. This might sound weird but, I discovered that silence is truly golden. It lifts and releases the ‘old’ and creates a immense space to allow the ‘new’ to enter. For me, my frustration was released and I learned a very comforting and important lesson. I did not have to wait to achieve my goal in order to serve and be of value. I could begin now and serve throughout my journey. As soon as I realized this, my true motive came to life. It was not the title, the status and the money that would give me the capacity or abilities to be of value and of service. It was the journey, the struggles, the hardships and most of all, my response through my attitude, behavior and actions that would make me of the outmost true value. Today, 5 years later, I am so grateful for the wait.

Had I not been prepared and developed through the wait,
had I not build patience and perseverance through the wait,
had I not come to terms with my motive and true value, in other words,
had I not embraced the beauty of transforming and awakening my true nature,

I would not have been able to truly accept the implications of achieving my goal. I would not have been able to have the passion to adequately perform in ways beyond anything I could imagine when faced with even more challenging situations.