Like so many others around the world, as I’m writing this post, I’m in my first week of quarantine.
My husband and I cancelled all the conferences and workshops we had scheduled to host, working and doing what we can from home.
Thankfully, we are fine and safe. But, we will keep staying inside for as long as needed to help flatten this curve.
I hope that whatever part of the world you are in, you and your loved ones are safe and healthy, too.
I know that given the fact that practically overnight, our daily normal life has been disrupted, reduced to hunkering down inside for an indefinite period of time, many people are feeling understandably frightful, stressed and uncertain.
It’s not easy, and we all have a huge responsibility in keeping ourselves and others safe that we must take seriously. But we can still have fun exploring new ways to stay connected and finding creative, playful activities, as we’ve seen done in countries where people have been dealing with this crisis for some time now.
Surely, at some point, some of us will also be faced with being by ourselves. While we may not have control over this situation, we can definitely control the way we approach and make use of our alone time. So that when it is over, we’ll actually come out of it stronger, wiser and happier.
I’m here to help with trying to pull through this challenging time of self-isolation, quarantine and social distancing, which can trigger feelings of loneliness, so it won’t be too unbearable.
Loneliness has already been a social health crisis before this virus outbreak.
Oftentimes, the source of pain from loneliness comes from feeling disconnected and alienated from ourselves and others, and viewing ourselves as inadequate or unworthy of the attention and appraisal of others. This can result with a constant anguish to be loved and a longing to feel valued by others.
So, what if we use this time of mandatory self-isolation, quarantine and social distancing to build a more loving relationship with ourselves, so we no longer depend on others to feel worthy?
It’s important to realize that feeling worthy doesn’t necessarily mean having to become a better person or getting better at doing something, but much more about letting go of all the false beliefs and unrealistic expectations that have buried your worth, which is already deep within—letting go of everything that isn’t you and allowing your true self to come out and flourish, something that can ONLY be done in Solitude.
This challenging time is a perfect opportunity to discover the glory of quiet time spent alone, time spent listening to your heart, and the precious gift that Solitude brings that cannot come from anywhere else.
Your heart is your best compass on your journey through life—in each and every moment.
It is the source that governs your speech, guards your sight and guides your steps.
However, when the heart is restless and aching, fear becomes the needle, drawn to align with negative energies, giving you a false sense of direction, making you feel lost, disconnected and unworthy.
When you make the conscious decision to silently and attentively listen to the conversations you have with yourself, you become aware of your inner dialogues that may have contaminated your heart with fear. As you keep listening, without feeding the chatter, and feel any emotion that arises, the mind will slowly quiet down. Then, the heart finally has space to breath, relax and return to its natural peaceful state. In that peaceful state, love takes fear’s place.
Now, love becomes the needle, drawn to align with Divine, positive energies, giving you the wisdom to learn what you need to know, the strength to grow through whatever you’re going through, with the clarity to transform it into a new chance to build something better that’s true to YOU.
Get to know yourself
Try sitting with yourself and writing down everything that surfaces from inside you; your feelings, your thoughts, even describing everything you’ve been doing and are doing now. All of it, describe your work, your daily routine, your interactions, your social life, your personal life, family life.
Don’t get stuck if you feel a discomfort of sitting with yourself and your feelings, that discomfort has probably been there for a while and you’re just now diving into it. Keep diving into it, even if you need to drop your pen and let everything out in the open by talking to the room, it’s perfectly okay!
At some point, you’ll feel like a weight is being lifted off your shoulders, you’ll probably even be on a roll and notice yourself writing or saying things that will take you by surprise, things you probably never knew about yourself, or how you really feel about certain things.
It’s all good!
Take inventory of your life
Look at everything you’ve let out before you. Use this time to reflect upon the most important things in your life that will be worth going back to. Recognize the things that this self-isolation has made you distance yourself from, that without them, is now actually bringing peace into your life, and will not be worth going back to. Discover and explore the things you’ve always wanted to do, but never seemed to have the time for, that will be worth investing time in.
Then, when all this is over, you’ll look back on this time as the most precious gift you’ve ever been given, which completely turned your life around.
Invite Gratitude
Invite Gratitude into the scene of your room. Yes, Gratitude, even during this difficult time. Because loneliness is a feeling, not a fact. It’s when we try to find an answer to our loneliness that we create colorful stories to explain the feeling, and believe them to be the truth.
Keep looking at everything you’ve written or observe everything you’ve voiced out loud. Notice even the smallest, simplest things you might have taken for granted and be thankful for them. Notice every obstacle you’ve ever had to overcome, and how far you’ve already come. Be thankful for everything you’ve come to know and for the ability to have pulled through, getting you to where you are today. Because sometimes things need to fall apart and your heart needs to break, before they can be put back together in a new and better way.
Gratitude is a powerful tool in rewriting a whole new colorful story and opening your eyes to the good around you and realizing your self-worth. It is directly linked to the needle of love, pointing you in a direction beyond anything you could ever imagine and in bringing your worth out into the world.
The glory of being alone
Remember, solitude is a self-expression of the glory of being alone. There’s a liberating feeling in enjoying your own company and not depending on anyone to make you feel worthy. When you become your own best friend, you will freely give to others and spread the miracle of kindness without ever expecting anything in return.
You’ll see this challenging alone time not as something that has taken away from you, but as something you’re giving to help flatten this worldwide outbreak, and strengthening your worth by doing your part to perhaps bring about a radical change in the world.
One global family
None of us know how the next weeks or months will unfold, but one thing we know for certain is that we are ALL in this together as one global family. If there’s one good thing that can come from this virus, it’s that it can open our eyes to the fact that we are all ONE, as a part of nature.
Bill Gates said it best when he said,
“Covid-19 is reminding us that we are all equal, regardless of our culture, religion, occupation, financial situation, or how famous we are. This disease treats us all equally, perhaps we should too.”
I want to leave you with this beautiful poem from Kitty O’Meara
And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.
And the people healed. And, in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless, and heartless ways, the earth began to heal.
And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again, they grieved their losses, and made new choices, and dreamed new images, and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully, as they had been healed.
I am confident that if we keep coming together, supporting one another, we could come out of this feeling more connected to ourselves and each other than before.
Sending lots of love and a big, warm distant hug from my home to yours!
